DepressedCouchFart – Because pretending to care is exhausting. And apathy deserves a coin too.

There’s a coin now.
It’s called DepressedCouchFart.
We didn’t mean to make it. It just sort of… happened.

It started, like most things these days, in a moment of silence that wasn’t peaceful. The kind of silence where your phone’s dead, the TV’s muted, and your thoughts are louder than anything you want to hear. You’re lying on a couch that smells like yesterday. Or maybe last month. You’re not sure anymore.

You think about doing something. Anything. But even breathing feels like an unpaid bill.
And then, there’s a fart. Not dramatic. Not powerful. Just a faint, defeated wheeze into the cushion.
You laugh. Not because it’s funny. Because it’s all you’ve got left.

That was the spark. That fart was honest. That fart didn’t pretend to have potential. That fart didn’t ask you to hustle, to grind, to believe. It just was.

So we made a coin.
No whitepaper. No future. No purpose.
Just a low effort digital monument to the feeling of waking up at 2 PM and immediately wanting to go back to sleep.

It’s not here to fix your life. Your life isn’t a startup. It’s not scalable. It’s a barely functional playlist of missed calls, weird dreams, and delivery food shame.
DepressedCouchFart won’t make you rich. But neither did all those books, podcasts, or overpriced productivity apps you downloaded in a manic episode and never opened again.

We launched it. It’s real. Unfortunately.
It’s sitting there on the blockchain like an awkward text you can’t unsend.

Buy it. Don’t. It’s fine. We don’t care. You don’t care. That’s the point.
This isn’t hope. This isn’t hype. It’s just one more dumb thing to believe in for five minutes before the void swallows it whole.

t. me/DepressedCouchFart