$DepressedCouchFart Has Launched – Because the Market Is as Wrecked as We Are.

We did it. After countless rugs, endless hopium, and one too many nights spent staring at bleeding charts, $DepressedCouchFart has finally launched. The market is still a disaster, altcoins are still free-falling, and the only thing moving is the exit liquidity—straight out of our portfolios.

At some point, we all stopped believing in the next 100x. We stopped refreshing CoinGecko every five minutes. We stopped pretending there was a way out. And that’s why $DepressedCouchFart exists—because if we’re all going to sit here, staring into the void, questioning every financial decision we’ve ever made, we might as well do it together.

This isn’t just a token. It’s a movement for every wrecked trader who has held too long, bought the top, and whispered “it’ll come back” into the abyss. It’s for the ones who watched their life savings disappear into liquidity pools, who believed in “game-changing” utilities, and who still flinch when they hear the word “roadmap.”

No fake hype, no VC funding, no influencer shills. Just a community of people who have been through it all, embracing the only undeniable truth left in crypto—the only thing still pumping… is the couch cushion.

So what now? Do we moon? Probably not. Do we rugged ourselves? No chance—because we’re too lazy to even get up. Do we keep sitting here, watching the market sink, making memes, and sharing our collective trauma? Absolutely.

Welcome to $DepressedCouchFart—the most honest token in a sea of lies.

Contract: CUCkibMeeFG1rYWhxnaPqHeACbjg4hX4NSDstohHpump

Sit back, hold tight, and let nature take its course. 💨